Steph, the 2011 Hugo Voter, Reviews: The Short Story Ballot

So -- I've signed up as a supporting member of this year's World Con. It didn't take a lot of arm twisting. All Larry Correia had to say was "You get lots of reading material in your membership packet!" and I was sold.

At any rate, as a supporting member of World Con, I get to vote in this year's Hugo Awards. Woot! But I'm not going to hog all the fun. So that you folks may join in, I will be posting capsule reviews and my personal selections for each fiction-related short list.

Today, I sat down and got the short stories out of the way. Here are my thoughts:

“Amaryllis”, Carrie Vaughn (Lightspeed, June 2010)

Premise: Set in a post-apocalyptic future in which resources and births are both tightly controlled, "Amaryllis" tells the story of a family leader, Marie, who hasn't quite shaken off the stigma of her past. You see, Marie's mother decided to give birth to her daughter illicitly, which resulted in the break-up of Marie's original family group. Since then, Marie has had to contend with a faint whiff of local prejudice as she works to keep her new family alive. And what is the central conflict here? Marie's adopted daughter, Nina, would like to have a baby, but this requires council approval.

Steph's Comments: There's a lot of potential in Vaughn's basic idea. Unfortunately, Marie's past isn't really the terrible burden it should have been, and that bleeds a lot of the tension out of the story. The crooked and bigoted scale minder (who weighs the daily catches for each fishing boat) is dealt with a little too handily; similarly, Nina gets what she wants with minimum fuss.

More importantly: Any author who takes on population control, I feel, should always remain mindful of such a policy's devastating real world effects. It is a well known fact, for example, that China's "One Child" program resulted in the loss of thousands of baby girls. It also required a curtailment of personal liberty that was frankly obscene. On these matters, however, Vaughn remains silent, and that is another weakness in this story. Is it theoretically possible that a cataclysm of some sort might render population control an absolute necessity? I suppose, but Vaughn doesn't establish that the world in her short story really is that strapped for natural resources, and consequently, I feel unsatisfied with the characters' basic unwillingness to challenge their traditions.

Steph's Rating: 6.5

*****

“For Want of a Nail”, Mary Robinette Kowal (Asimov’s, September 2010)

Premise: In many ways, the premise of this story is similar to the premise of the above-discussed "Amaryllis" -- but in this case, the setting is resource-limited because the characters are apparently traveling aboard a generation ship. The principal conflict in "For Want of a Nail" revolves around Rava, an AI wrangler, and her attempts to repair Cordelia, the sentient AI who has kept track of her family's records during their long (presumably interstellar) journey. What do we eventually discover? That Cordelia has been hiding one family member's dementia for two years in order to prevent the euthanization and recycling of said family member. Youch.

Steph's Comments: Alas, this story is plagued by some of the same moral passivity which hampers "Amaryllis." While I can more readily accept the need to conserve resources in this particular context, I still find it deeply, deeply disturbing that Rava's family callously ignores Uncle Georgo's clear wishes and fails to challenge the law. I don't care how stringent the rules are or how necessary it is to "recycle." Euthanizing a relative should be portrayed as a tragedy. There should've been more agonizing. There should have been more arguing. Absent this, the family's decision feels distinctly inhuman.

On the other hand, the subsequent deactivation of Cordelia does carry with it the sense of grief and injustice that should accompany the deliberate disposal of a sentient being, so on this score, "For Want of a Nail" barely surpasses "Amaryllis." Could this have been a "feature-worthy" story? Yes, but only if Kowal had given Uncle Georgo and Cordelia equal consideration.

Steph's Rating: 6.8

*****

“Ponies”, Kij Johnson (Tor.com, November 17, 2010)

Premise: Barbara and her pony, Sunny, have been invited to a party with TheOtherGirls, but popularity comes with a cost: Sunny must give up her horn, her wings, and her voice. When Sunny takes a stand on the matter of her voice at the end of this vignette, she is killed, and Barbara is ostracized.

Steph's Comments: This story seriously won the Nebula? I don't understand that at all. Johnson's message is one only an aggrieved feminist could love, and it is delivered with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Yes -- middle school sucked for me too, but I eventually got over it.

Steph's Rating: 3.0

*****

“The Things”, Peter Watts (Clarkesworld, January 2010)

Premise: This story is written from the perspective of a shape-shifting alien and details the alien's struggle to understand humanity.

Steph's Comments: I hear that this story was intended to be Watts' riff on The Thing, but as I don't really know anything about that particular B-movie classic, I tackled "The Things" on its own terms. My impression? Watts does a credible job portraying his main character as truly alien in its thoughts and behaviors, and that's a definite plus. On the whole, though, this story fails to pack a genuine punch. It's mildly interesting, but it doesn't really offer, for me, any flash-bang philosophical or psychological insights.

Steph's Rating: 6.7

*****

Steph's General Impressions of the Ballot:

If I were to judge the state of modern literary science fiction based on this ballot alone, I would conclude that the genre is both tired and morally suspect. There are no truly new ideas to be found here, and even the best story of the lot offends me when it comes to its thematic particulars.

Steph's Personal Selection: "For Want of a Nail," reluctantly.

Classics: Farscape 2:7 - Home on the Remains

*****
This post is our last before our Memorial Day hiatus.
Regular posting will resume on May 31^st
*****

Overall: 7.8

The concepts and character development are pretty strong here, but the guest performances occasionally leave something to be desired.

Plot Synopsis:

Farscape World has a summary here.

The Skinny:

Though this isn't a perfect episode (see my discussion of the acting in particular), there really is much to like here. For one thing, I think the writers should be commended for injecting a little realism into the proceedings. Given that Our Heroes are all on the Peacekeepers' Most Wanted List and are flying through a sector of space where they are not always likely to come across a convenient commerce planet, it was inevitable that they would run out of food sooner or later.

Further, since I've already suspended my disbelief and have accepted the possibility that there can be such a thing as a sentient, mobile plant, I can actually follow the writers' logic when it comes to Zhaan's -- adaptation. All living things need nitrogen in order to build their proteins. In the real world, plants get their daily recommended dose of nitrogen from nitrogen-fixing organisms in the soil -- or, if they grow in nitrogen-poor areas, they trap and digest insects. Obviously, since Zhaan is walking around, she's not going to get nitrogen from soil. Thus, like a Venus fly trap, she needs to eat meat. And like a Venus fly trap, she would have some means to disable any source of meat which happens to come her way. I get it. It makes sense. And that's relatively unusual for this show; Farscape tends to prioritize the Rule of Cool over the rules of biology. See also: the space-dwelling budong featured in this episde -- or D'Argo's ability to survive for a brief time in a vacuum.

Lastly, we get to learn a little more about Chiana's background here -- and we get to see her continue to grow as an individual. As I've noted in previous reviews, Chiana has learned to survive through thievery and prostitution -- and here, when B'Soog refuses to show her and her shipmates charity, she does temporarily default to what she knows best. But as Altana states in one scene I've highlighted below, Chiana also has a heart of gold and the potential to become something more. That's why I believe, ultimately, that D'Argo is good for her. Some fans take the view that D'Argo is far too paternalistic where Chiana is concerned, but I think his attitude is just about right. Scrappy though she is, Chiana still needs, on some level, to be protected from predators like B'Soog who will only use her for their pleasure and then throw her away.

Writing: 8.5

The strong character work and the imaginative premises make this a very good Farscape script. See above.

Acting: 7.0

The acting is a weak point, however. While the regulars put in their usual strong performances, some of the guest characters are portrayed with a little too much affectation and stylization. They don't feel like natural, realistic people.

Message: 8.0

Apologies to all the feminists out there, but I like that D'Argo is so traditional and therefore wants to protect Chiana. I think it's very sweet.

Highlights:

Aeryn: What's that appalling smell?
John: Breakfast.
Aeryn: Dentics? You can't eat dentics!
John: Fried dentics. You can eat anything as long as it's fried.
Aeryn: I'll pass.
John: Suit yourself, Jenny Craig, but I'm hungry. (He takes a big bite out of it - then gags and quickly spits it out as Rygel makes a sound of revulsion. John picks up one of the fried dentics and crams it into the Hynerian’s gaping mouth.)
Aeryn: (a little smug) Obviously not that hungry. (Heh.)

Chiana: What were you thinking, attacking B'Soog like that? What, did you think he'd just hand over the meat?
D'Argo: It seemed like a better plan than waiting for you to frell him into submission.
Chiana: Well if that's what it takes, then that's what it takes! I thought this was supposed to be about saving Zhaan!
D'Argo: There are other ways to get the crystals that we need. I will not allow you to stay here with him.
Chiana: Don't tell me what to do!
D'Argo: Well somebody has to! (Awww. I love you, D'Argo.)

Rygel: Sorry, Crichton!
(Crichton runs in with the keedva at his heels and makes a frantic grab at Rygel's throne sled.)
John: OH NO YOU DON'T! YOU'RE NOT DITCHING ME!
Rygel: GET OFF! LET GO!
John: NO WAY!
Rygel: There is no reason for both of us to die! I am a Dominar! You're just - YOU!
John: SHUT YOUR YAP AND GIVE IT MORE GAS!
Rygel: There is no more gas! Let go! I can't die!
John: Screw you!
Rygel: WE'RE GOING DOWN!
John: RY-GEEEEELLLLL!
Rygel: Let go! I won't die! For the last time - let go now or I'll bite your fingers off!
John: Oh yeah? Screw you! (Rygel bites down as promised, and John howls with pain.) AAAAHHHH!!! RYGEEELLL! (But at that moment the shrill whistle is heard again and the keedva abruptly stops its attack. John and Rygel continue to swat at each other, but John hisses at him as he realizes the beast has withdrawn.) Rygel! Rygel! Hold it! (With that, he bites Rygel’s ear to get his attention. They let go of each other in the sudden silence.)
Rygel: Lucky for you! (John head butts him and Rygel howls.) AAAAHHHH! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?
John: I ain't your lunch!
Rygel: (spitting) The dentics tasted better!
John: (spitting) You tasted worse! (ROTFL! I love it when these two fight. Their chemistry is fabulous. And yes -- I just said that a live-action actor has chemistry with a muppet. Deal with it.)

Altana: Couldn't have done this without you.
D'Argo: Both of our purposes are served. We save Zhaan, and you get out of here.
Altana: I'm not gonna miss the stench. But I'll miss the thrill of it.
D'Argo: Thrill?
Altana: Always living, constantly on your guard - alive and fighting!
D'Argo: You sound like Chiana.
Altana: Oh, that girl! She's a wild one. But she's got a heart of gold.
D'Argo: Her loyalties are certainly flexible. That's for sure.
Altana: She'll do whatever it takes to get meat for your friend.
D'Argo: That's what worries me.
Altana: Nah, we always came out on top, the two of us. We had our fun, even when she and Temmon were together. Oh, that fellow. He was good for her and her brother.
D'Argo: And yet she repays his kindness by stealing from him. That's why it is very difficult to trust her.
Altana: (pausing in her work) D'Argo, are you and Chiana together?
D'Argo: No.
Altana: No, or not yet?
D'Argo: That's up to her.

(And finally...)

Pardon the Interruption: House 7:23 - Moving On

Overall Rating: 9.9

Wow...they actually went there...House has finally completely lost his mind!

Classics: B5 4:10 - Racing Mars

Overall: 7.2

Eh. This one has a few interesting bits (hence the high par score), but mainly, it's just okay.

Plot Synopsis:

The Lurker's Guide has a summary here.

The Skinny:

'Tis time once again to resort to handy-dandy bullet points. First, what I liked:

• The humor kind of works this time. Regardless of my lukewarm feelings in re: Sheridan and Delenn, JMS did get a genuine laugh out of me with the "woo-hoo" bit. I also laughed for real at some of the dialogue between Franklin and Marcus.


• Also, plus one to JMS for keeping the Drakh and their Keepers at the forefront of our consciousness with Captain Jack's storyline. The Shadows may be gone, but their minions are still here, and they're apparently working for Clark.

Second, what I found interesting but somewhat flawed:

• It is definitely intriguing to see Sheridan struggle - as he did in In the Shadow of Z'ha'dum - to live up to his principles once things get personal. As we see here, it's not quite so easy for Sheridan to make categorical pronouncements on the right of free speech when it is a former associate who is slandering him on the enemy's network news channel.


• On the other hand, I think this storyline would be even more fascinating if it weren't so blindingly obvious that Sheridan does not in fact have a God complex -- and if the propagandistic attacks on Sheridan weren't so blatant. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I think anyone who has two brain cells to rub together should've figured out by now that the ISN narrative is total crap.


• Bottom line, I think Garibaldi's control personality is being telegraphed a little too loudly at this point. Sheridan tries to discourage a woman's blind worship right in front of Garibaldi and Garibaldi completely ignores that? Yeah -- JMS should've kept things more ambiguous.

Third, what I hated:

• Claton Landey's performance as Number Two is just awful. I mean, how completely over-the-top and cornball can you get? Ugh, ugh, ugh.


• A female pope? Har har, JMS. You are just so clever.

Writing: 7.5

The writing is probably this episode's strength, but as per usual, JMS sometimes goes for the ax when a rapier would be a better choice.

Acting: 7.0

Generally speaking, the acting is fine, but as I remarked above, I loathed Landey's Number Two.

Message: 7.0

Most people do have a hard time with free speech absolutism -- and I think it's good to acknowledge that fact.

Highlights:

MARCUS: My turn. Best of five. I spy with my little eye something that begins with B.
FRANKLIN: (bored) Boxes.
MARCUS: Right. (He tries again.) I spy with my little eye something beginning with M.
FRANKLIN: (still bored) More boxes.
MARCUS: Two in a row!
FRANKLIN: And that's when I shot him, Your Honor. (LOL!)

SHERIDAN: I don't know what's gotten into you lately, but it's not my problem. I've got a job to do, and I can't let anyone interfere with that. Not even you. Now privately, you think what you want, but publicly? I don't want to hear this stuff anymore. Otherwise, I'm going to have to make things difficult for you around here. I don't want to have to do that, but I will.
GARIBALDI: Don't threaten me, Sheridan. I'm a private citizen now.
SHERIDAN: With an obligation to keep the oath you gave me, Ivanova, and the Alliance. You held a position of authority here. Because of that, people took stock in what you say. You broke that trust. You knew what was at stake in that interview, and you deliberately gave aid and comfort to the enemy in front of a billion people!
GARIBALDI: (sarcastic) Ah, a little criticism and the whole universe starts falling apart --
SHERIDAN: Enough! Now if you have a legitimate complaint, you make it. But if it's a personal attack in disguise, it stops right here.
GARIBALDI: Hey, I didn't make this personal. You did that all by yourself.
SHERIDAN: What are you talking about?
GARIBALDI: The people who work for you -- they're not following the cause. They're following you. Did you ever hear of a little thing called the cult of personality? Well, it's not about us. It's not about doing what's right. It's about how you're fulfilling prophecy -- how you went to Z'ha'dum and came back alive. Hell, you even came back from the dead. How could you possibly get any more messianic than that? You know what the real problem is? You're starting to buy into your own publicity. And maybe - just maybe - it's time somebody punches a hole in that. (Of course, Garibaldi is under the influence of his altered personality here, but it's still interesting to watch Sheridan skate that line between liberty and security.)

(And finally, a video clip...)



(LOL! Classic.)

Classics: BtVS 5:5 - No Place Like Home

Overall Rating: 8.9

Two very nice misdirection tricks give the episode a very creepy feel that resolves with a weighty, and yet heart-warming scene and sets up the entire season beautifully.

Plot Synopsis:

The full summary can be found at BuffyGuide.com.

The Skinny:

The key moment that takes this show from "solid plot-mover" to near-feature status is the last scene, during which Buffy commits to defending Dawn. When she learns that Dawn is not, in truth, supposed to be there...that her memories are invented...Buffy's first impulse to wish for that spell to be undone. But when she actually SEES Dawn...sees how hurt she is after their altercation during Buffy's spell-revealing trance...she realizes that, real or not, this is still her sister. The big commitment happens when Buffy, frustrated that Dawn won't forgive her, recalls something from that invented past and stops short. Whether it happened or not, it's real to both of them...as is their sisterly bond.

We'll learn, later, when Buffy questions whether she is capable of loving someone after her break-up with Riley, that she burns with it...her love is brighter than all the fire in creation...and that this is what makes her special (relative to other Slayers who lived in solitude and hunted on instinct). But it is obvious to everyone except Buffy herself by now...and it's scenes like this reconciliation between Buffy and Dawn that have painted that picture.

Writing: 9.0

This one carries forward a lot of running plot threads from earlier episodes well, but at the same time sets up the ultimate villain for Buffy and one of the best Buffy-centered stories you'll ever see...impressive to do all of that in 45 minutes.

Acting: 8.7

I do have to say that Clare Kramer was a tad too "big" in this one...her insanity trip was...well...I guess the right word would be hammy. She does it much better in future episodes and pulls off a real fear factor that is a bit off in this episode.

Message: 9.0

This one has two messages woven into the story-telling fabric. Firstly - that with all of Buffy's power...she's still human and there are still things she cannot fight - brain cancer for one (which we'll find out later, but the illness is obvious)...and Buffy was probably too eager to HOPE that her mother was being attacked by something she could fight. And secondly, that her responsibility to Dawn is not attached to some arbitrary truth of events before the magic that created her...but to the higher truth that all life is sacred - especially the innocent.

Classics: Farscape 2:6 - Picture If You Will

Overall: 7.2

Though there really isn't much of a point to this episode, it is just freaky-deaky enough to end up on the high end of the par range.

Plot Synopsis:

Farscape World has a summary here.

The Skinny:

Raise your hand if you were a middle-grader in the early 90's. Now keep your hands up if you read R.L. Stine's classic Goosebumps series. Okay, now how many of you read Say Cheese and Die? Well, this episode is kind of like that. There's no camera, but there is a picture that apparently tells the future, and the future it tells is always exceedingly bad for our major players.

Most of the fandom - and I include myself here - seems to be in agreement that Maldis was not a character who rated a second appearance. He was and is too over-the-top evil to really fit in with the general ethos of the series. But because this episode reminds me of something that scared the crap out of me when I was a kid, I'm inclined to be generous. Really, the only way this episode could've been improved upon (assuming, of course, that we keep Maldis in the storyline) is if the writers had decided to include living shadows which attack and eat you in the middle of the night. That was the scariest childhood horror story ever.

Writing: 7.5

Again, I'm not sure why the writers decided to bring back Maldis, but there are parts of this episode that are genuinely creepy.

Acting: 8.0

This is a Maldis episode, but surprisingly enough, the melodrama is not as bad as it could have been.

Message: 6.0

There's no message here that I can see. Just sit back and enjoy the fun-house mirror effects and the aforementioned creep factor.

Steph Reads Baened Books: Capsule Reviews III

Monster Hunter International, Larry Correia

Premise: "Five days after Owen Zastava Pitt pushed his insufferable boss out of a fourteenth story window, he woke up in the hospital with a scarred face, an unbelievable memory, and a job offer.

It turns out that monsters are real. All the things from myth, legend, and B-movies are out there, waiting in the shadows. Officially secret, some of them are evil, and some are just hungry. On the other side are the people who kill monsters for a living. Monster Hunter International is the premier eradication company in the business.

And now Owen is their newest recruit. It’s actually a pretty sweet gig, except for one little problem. An ancient entity known as the Cursed One has returned to settle a centuries old vendetta. Should the Cursed One succeed, it means the end of the world, and MHI is the only thing standing in his way. With the clock ticking towards Armageddon, Owen finds himself trapped between legions of undead minions, belligerent federal agents, a cryptic ghost who has taken up residence inside his head, and the cursed family of the woman he loves.

Business is good...

Welcome to Monster Hunter International." - from the author's website.

Steph's Comments: Larry Correia loves weaponry. He really, really loves it. If you don't care to read passages in which a particular gun is obsessively described down to the very last detail, then you probably don't want to pick up this book. (And you're probably not a Baen reader either, so what are you doing here? Take your snobbery somewhere else!)

Monster Hunter International is basically a summer blockbuster in book form. From page one, Correia's focus is to get your adrenaline pumping by blowing stuff up and killing some bad guys. Our heroes spend much of the novel either covered in monster guts or recovering in the hospital. But all of that is okay with me because Correia doesn't deal in simple empty-headed mayhem. His characters are actually likable people; indeed, I was gratified to see a few Christians in the mix. Moreover, Correia walks on solid thematic ground by acknowledging the temptation to seize power which lurks in every human soul.

And by the way, it also helps that Correia completely avoids romanticizing his monsters. There are no brooding - or, God forbid, sparkly - vampires to be found here. There are only a Big Bad, his loyal minions, and their quest to take over the time stream and thereby destroy the world as we know it. As I implied above, that definitely works for me!

Steph's Rating: 8.5

View from the Imperium, Jody Lynn Nye

Premise: "P. G. Wodehouse meets space opera, as Ensign Thomas Innes Loche Kinago, fresh from the Academy, is given his first command. A crumb from the upper crust, he's eager to uphold the traditions of his family, and in particular, his mother, a distinguished Admiral of the Imperium. Of course, he's aware of the importance of always having simply smashing tailored uniforms on hand, and having his camera ready to record memorable moments for his scrapbook. In the meantime, a charismatic leader has arisen who seems able to control the minds of anyone he meets, and may be on his way to taking over the entire galaxy. Can Kinago's aristocratic bearing and unbridled snobbery stand up to such a challenge? Fortunately, his constant companion, the unflappable Jeeves, er, Parsons, is on hand to look after the young, impulsive master, and somehow help his charge bumble his way through, perhaps even saving the galaxy in the process." - from the Baen website.

Steph's Comments: I love the main character of this book so much. Seriously:



Contrary to Baen's book description, Thomas is not actually a snob. Impulsive? Yes. A bit oblivious? Yes. But unlike his noble cousins, Thomas is also filled with an utterly sincere desire to do good (and make friends). "I can be useful!" is his oft-repeated refrain, and by the end of the novel, you really do get the sense that, with a little maturation and a little study, Thomas could be a fine leader indeed.

As for the Imperium itself, well -- it strikes me as quite skeevy that the ruling class has resorted to genetic manipulation to maintain control. The potential for abuse of that power seems very high indeed. On the other hand, Nye does make said potential for misuse a key plot point, so I believe she is conscious of the technology's dark side.

Overall, I would like to see a lot more of Thomas's universe. The majority of the novel is written in first person from Thomas' point of view (this was an obvious choice given Nye's goal to emulate Wodehouse), so of the motives of the Imperium's enemies, we know very little. I hope Nye plans to turn this into a series, as I believe the history of the Imperium (and its neighbors) is definitely worth exploring in depth.

Steph's Rating: 8.0

Classics: SG1 5:15 / 5:16 - Summit / Last Stand

Overall Rating: 6.5

I wish that the Gate writers had spent a little more time in earlier episodes exploring the role that human collaborators played in Goa'uld domination...this two parter has that on its side, but I can't say that anything really grabbed my interest here.

Plot Synopsis:

The two parts can be summarized by recaps from the Stargate Wiki (Part I and Part II).

The Skinny:

You know...Stargate had only one major two-part episode between The Serpent's Lair (end of first season) and Mobius (end of 8th season) that did anything to capture my imagination. And there were a BUNCH of highly touted, action-filled two-part plot-movers in that span. For some reason, when Stargate writers set their mind to producing a two-parter, it tends to get crammed full of very generic action plots and predictable "how are they going to get out of THIS one" cliffhangers. I'm sorry to say that Summit/Last Stand is another such very ordinary featured story.

Compare Stargate two-parters like this one, like The Tok'ra, like Nemesis/Minor Victories...to two part gut-shots like Behind the Lines/Rocks and Shoals, In Purgatory's Shadow/By Inferno's Light, The Homecoming/The Circle/The Siege, The Search, etc from Deep Space Nine and the difference is obvious. Trek writers have tended to use two parters to tell stories that had more carte blanche to bend the rules, change the direction of major running plots, and carry bigger stakes. Stargate writers used two part episodes to keep you hooked and engaged in the plot short term and to spend their special effects budget for the year (heh)...but you really don't come away from most of them remembering things that will last you years or deeply affected emotionally. They tend to be straightforward storytelling and simple delivery. Other than Heroes (seventh season), which actually was a show-stopping number the way that a two-hour story should be.

This one feels like brain candy, rather than soul food. It entertains...it involves some higher stakes that lead to an interesting dilemma for Daniel, and we learn some very interesting things about the Goa'uld System Lords...but...it doesn't make you think AT ALL...and...well...that tends to bore someone like me. Without meaning to sound high and mighty (I certainly don't feel that way)...I do prefer to be challenged when I watch TV. At least a little. When I get to these gate two-parters, the task of reviewing them invariably feels like a chore. They're longer and demand more time and attention and it's rarely worth it intellectually.

Writing: 6.0

The script feels pretty uninspired to me...even the keepers of the Stargate Wiki could only find one notable quote in the entire two-hour event...and that's not from lack of site maintenance...I didn't really get hit by any of the dialogue either.

Acting: 7.5

Anna-Louise Plowman (Osiris) and Michael Shanks did work pretty well together and I always tip my cap to Carmen Argenziano (Jacob)...but most of the cast was going through the motions on this one.

Message: 6.0

I don't think this script was intended to have much of a message...it would have been a heck of a lot more interesting to see a longer struggle between Daniel's desire to save his former lover from the grips of Osiris and the needs of the mission (to kill the entire body of the system lords)...they made the moral tension completely moot by introducing Anubis and thus making it pointless to attack the system lords.

Pardon the Interruption: House 7:22 - After Hours

Overall: 9.8

It is a very rare thing indeed for an episode to contain three - THREE - plots that are all excellent.

Classics: B5 4:9 - Atonement

Overall: 7.8

This is an interesting Delenn vehicle, but JMS fails to capitalize on what the episode reveals.

Plot Synopsis:

The Lurker's Guide has a summary here.

The Skinny:

Admittedly, this episode inspires in me a certain smugness. I mean, here we have the Minbari - a people favored by the Vorlons (and, at times, by JMS) - behaving like doctrinaire racists. "You can't marry Sheridan, Delenn! He's impure." And the Minbari are better than the Centauri how exactly?

Back in 2005, I actually proposed and participated in a sort of cage match at Dragon*Con that pitted the Minbari against the Centauri and asked the question, "Who is worse?" My position? Well, at least the Centauri tried to keep some Narns around to be their slaves and personal playthings. The Minbari, on the other hand, went completely ballistic and tried to kill everyone -- and I mean everyone. They even pursued the Humans who were trying to escape!

When we get down to the matter of personal guilt, though, that's when things get a little more complex. I think Londo is more culpable than Delenn because he made his fateful decision while calm and stone-cold sober. On the other hand, Londo ultimately apologizes to G'Kar and gets smacked by karma good and hard for his actions. Does Delenn apologize to Sheridan? We don't know because JMS never shows that to us. Now, I suppose you could consider Delenn's actions since the Earth-Minbari War to be tantamount to an apology, but JMS, an ex-Catholic, is quite clear on the point that the oral confession also matters.

But I digress. I definitely appreciate the glimpse at Delenn's backstory that this episode provides. I particularly enjoyed seeing how Dukhat shaped Delenn as a politician and philosopher. However, I think Atonement suffers because Sheridan is locked out of the proceedings. When Lennier discovers that Delenn cast the deciding vote which launched the Earth-Minbari War, there is no drama because Lennier almost worships Delenn and is therefore quick to excuse her actions. Imagine what would've happened if Sheridan had learned about Delenn's role in starting the war. Delenn has already gotten into trouble with Sheridan once for concealing Anna's fate. By all rights, she should've gotten into trouble again. Deceit does not a good relationship make.

Writing: 7.5

As I note above, JMS should've found some way to bring Sheridan into the Dreaming. Other than that, the script is solid.

Acting: 8.0

The performances are good, but certainly not flawless.

Message: 8.0

It's good that Delenn is working hard to make up for her past mistakes, but it's curious that JMS allows her to hide her guilt from Sheridan.

Highlights:

LENNIER: I wondered if you were going to leave without telling me. (He stands.) My place is at your side, Delenn.
DELENN: Not tonight.
LENNIER: Always.
DELENN: If you go, you will learn things about me that may change your opinion of me.
LENNIER: Delenn, I have pledged myself to your side come fire or storm or darkness or death. Can understanding be a greater danger?
DELENN: In this case, yes. (Ah, Lennier. Your love for Delenn is so cute -- and also so doomed.)

DELENN: If we do not know these humans, then they're a mystery to us. If the universe puts a mystery in front of us as a gift, politeness requires that we at least try to solve it.
DUKHAT: Ah! You're curious! You'd like to know, to simply understand. (To the others.) Simple curiosity! Ministers and counselors and warriors, and not one of you has the curiosity of the simple acolyte! Are you so jaded, so superior, so smug in your complacency that you've lost the simplest of joys -- that of the child and the closed box?

DELENN: Master -- may I ask a question? Will you make contact?
DUKHAT: No. The Council will be even more determined now. I could override their decision, but nothing would be served. Authority should never be used as a club, Delenn.
DELENN: Then why?
DUKHAT: When others do a foolish thing, you should tell them that it is a foolish thing. They may still continue to do it, but at least the truth is where it needs to be. They will be most upset with you now. You have embarassed them. I apologize for that. In my anger, I believe I may have caused you more problems in the future.
DELENN: No. No, Master. It was an honor.
DUKHAT: Don't interrupt when I'm being kind. It does not happen often, Delenn. (A beat.) Raise your eyes and look at me.
DELENN: (with eyes down) It is disrespectful.
DUKHAT: I cannot have an aide who will not look up. You will be forever walking into things. (And now Delenn's very first scene with Lennier in The Parliament of Dreams takes on a greater meaning. VERY nice!)

LENNIER: Then it was your order that began our war with the Humans.
DELENN: Yes. The Council was divided. Mine was the deciding vote. They killed Dukhat. I was furious. I never knew myself capable of such rage. All I could see was death.
LENNIER: Is this what you were afraid I would see? Then you are not thinking clearly, Delenn. The fault is not yours. The Humans misinterpreted the gesture of respect. They thought it to be the prelude to an attack. You were --
DELENN: -- the one who gave the order. Nothing can change that, Lennier. (At least she's morally centered enough to acknowledge that much.)

Classics: DS9 5:20 - Ferengi Love Songs

Overall Rating: 2.0

Ew.
Ew.
EEEWW.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Plot Synopsis:

A full round up of the thrilling romantic action adventure story that is guaranteed to make you wish you were dead just as much as Quark does in the opening scene can be found at the DS9 Encyclopedia here.

The Skinny:

C'mere Ira...no really..I just want to talk to you...I promise...it's nothing too bad. Just...c'mere for a sec. *WHAMMO!!!* See how your stomach feels now? Yeah...that's how your bad Ferengi jokes make your audience feel. And by this time, you KNEW this to be true. Fan reaction is not invisible to you...I know it isn't, because periodically, you comment on it in special features on your DVDs. I know you know the fans HATED your Ferengi episodes. So why did you do the same damned episode a dozen times in a row? Why do you not respect your fans enough to put away the toy you like and they don't and write something else? The worst part about this is...I can't figure out why Ira Steven Behr thought these MOOOOOOOOGIE and ZEKKIIEEEE!! lines were funny in the first place. I don't see any angle that would make me understand the humor in this.

Instead, we spend the entire episode hopelessly annoyed at the constant unpleasant screeching sounds coming from these Ferengi, the needless 2X4 head-slaps regarding the supposed weaknesses in 20th century capitalism (of course we know by now that these arguments are made against a straw man, not the real beast), the really REALLY icky romance, the gender-bending social "norms," the ridiculous music, the annoying (and inexplicable) adversaries, the predictable story lines, the horribly telegraphed jokes...

*sigh*

To top it all off...watching Ishka and Zek make out was just...gross. BLEECCHH!!!

There is just nothing redeeming about these Ferengi episodes. I think the 2.0 I'm giving this one might be a little bit generous...but all of that credit is going to the Rom/Leeta plot, which is actually marginally endearing other than the really poorly written dialogue. At least their hearts were in the right places while storyboarding this one - it makes sense that Rom would be worried about being taken for a ride given his past...and his lack of self confidence. I am not sure I agree with the conclusion that love means leaving nothing of yourself unguarded. I don't think the healthiest reaction to this conflict is to give up everything you own to prove you love someone. I think more balance would have helped. But...it was at least somewhat cute.

Other than that, however, I have nothing positive to say about this episode...so I'll say nothing else.

Writing: 1.0

One point for the Rom/Leeta story (out of 3), 0 for the Quark/Ishka/Zek plot (out of 7). Intentionally burdening your audience with things you know they hate because you think they're funny is working in bad faith with your unwritten contract and will lose you your job eventually if you work for someone other than Star Trek, where audiences go to die at least five times per season.

Acting: 4.0

Never did think Chase Masterson was much of an actress (sorry Dad...), and Shimerman can only do so much with a bad script...the rest of the Ferengi were AWFUL in this one.

Message: 1.0

Annoying anti-capitalist anti-western anti-audience episodes filled with straw man arguments and bad faith will not tend to do well at this blog.

Classics: BtVS 5:4 - Out of Mind

Overall Rating: 4.0

You're getting sleepy...so sleepy...you're in a tranquil place...a place called...Riley Finn's character. It's so beige and uninspired it can only have come from fourth season.

Plot Synopsis:

A full description of this tepid episode can be found at BuffyGuide.com.

The Skinny:

The goofy fangirls and fanboys that wrote the reviews at BuffyGuide.com are hardly role models for excellent discourse on the subject of Joss Whedon's first and most successful canon universe, but in this case, I think they're actually right for two separate reasons at the same time (!) and...you know...I don't think that's ever happened before. This episode fails for two main reason:

1. Riley is freakin' BORING. We never learned anything about him...I don't think we were supposed to learn something about him, because, to Joss and company, he was just a stand-in for normalcy, not the poster-boy. If they wanted Buffy to have a relationship with a corn-fed Iowan demon fighter with a good heart, they should have made that Iowan STAND FOR SOMETHING...they should have given him a character...not made him a pop-up punching clown for a point they wanted to make about Buffy being too unique and powerful to fit with a normal guy. There's something very aristocratic and anti-message (the show has always taken the position that although Buffy has superpowers, she is a normal girl at heart...a strong, wonderful person, but ordinary and human, nonetheless) to this notion that someone like Buffy couldn't possibly find someone like Riley admirable. The sooner this plot ends, the better.
2. The writers badly BADLY telegraphed the end of the Buffy/Riley relationship and the development of Spike's lustful (and inherently evil) attraction for Buffy. Nothing that happens involving Buffy and Spike, or Buffy and Riley will surprise the audience and make them think at all in right up through the attempted rape we should all have seen coming near the end of season 6...at which point they finally throw us a real curveball...we'll talk more about that when we get to it. The bottom line is...Riley's character isn't the only thing that's boring..his character ARC is boring too. It's just bad writing to give away the punchline before you start telling the joke.

It doesn't help that Blucas is a lame actor and they can't seem to find anyone good to play opposite SMG (sorry...still not a David Boreanez fan)...nor does it help that they're still throwing a lot of stuff at us all at once in this episode and spending not enough time developing any of it. That last bit gets better very soon though, FWIW.

Writing: 3.0

Wake Me Up when September Ends should be the theme song for Buffy. Seasons tend to start very slowly no matter what year you're in and they pack their filler episodes into the first 8 weeks. Call me when we get to the good stuff, please...because the writers seem to check out til then.

Acting: 5.0

Neither SMG nor Blucas is at all convincing in their scenework this week and it just kills the episode's tiny chances to enthrall me.

Message: 4.0

I guess the message seems to be, despite Buffy protests to the contrary, that Buffy really IS out of our league. Somehow...that doesn't make me want to root for her.

Classics: B5 4:8 - The Illusion of Truth

Overall: 9.0

JMS hates journalists. He really, really hates them. Fortunately, we do too.

Plot Synopsis:

The Lurker's Guide reports on ISN's perfidy here.

The Skinny:

Stephanie S.: My co-author and I seem to disagree slightly when it comes to this episode. I feel that in the contest between And Now For a Word and The Illusion of Truth, the latter turns out to be the weaker of the two. ISN's cant here is far more overtly Orwellian, and while I appreciate a homage as much as the next person, I do think the blatant nature of Randall's hatchet job renders it a little less applicable to real-world, present-day realities (unless we're talking about Michael Moore's "documentaries").

Nonetheless, I rate this episode very highly, and I do so because JMS's purposeful exaggerations still perform a vital service by revealing just how easy it is to distort the facts with a bit of editing. Even if it is the case that most journalists don't play with the raw footage the way Randall does here, we still shouldn't take their reports and analyses on faith. As Randall correctly observes, everyone has an agenda.

SABR Matt: I think that this episode's strength lies in the subtlety with which the subterfuge was accomplished. They spared none of the little details...everything that was in the preamble to the newscast...and in the newscast itself...was necessary to feel the full emotional impact of this dramatic hour of television. Letting us hear the true motivations of the people involved - e.g. Sheridan's fears about his father's fate, Franklin's fond hope that they'll be able to treat the TPs with shadow-abuse syndrome sooner, rather than later, Delenn's sincere desire to repay her allies for all their help during the shadow war, Londo's completely irrelevant conversation about the heat in his quarters, Lenier's points about the social programs Sheridan has instituted for the sufferers in Down Below - and then showing it to us again in the newscast with a completely twisted view of the evidence and yet only very minor edits to the raw footage...was truly brilliant.

I'll reference my sister's thoughts from the previous ISN-centered episode "And Now for a Word"...she took great pains to document all of the most common tricks a propagandist uses to sway public opinion when looking at the same evidence. Marginalize your opponent by portraying rational emotional reactions as irrational anger. Show evidence and then treat your analysis of that evidence as fact, rather than supposition. Appeal to experts who'll say what you need them to say as though those experts are truly objective and their opinions superior. Treat inconsistencies as concrete evidence of dangerous conspiracy. Level unsubstantiated charges at your opponent - just the charge is damaging, whether it gains traction in fact or not. Establish the mood you want to elicit in your readers/viewers with selective language (e.g. refering to B5 as a mystery constantly). That's all on display here...with the added twist that now, rather than just wrongly characterizing the analysis of events, they, in a few very carefully selected moments within the news footage, actually tampered with the evidence with some clever editing.

But the editing is in no way complex...in fact it's so subtle that even viewers who saw the first half of this episode might miss it if they're not watching carefully. For example, taking Sheridan's answers to questions about his romantic involvement with Delenn and making them seem to be answers to unasked questions about Earth's opposition to B5's policies, or splicing a few responses together out of order to paint a picture other than the truth. Notice how ISN preserves it's image of "business as usual" reporting by placing the story from B5 after today's (propagandist) headlines, by throwing in silly trivia segments, and by treating the B5 story as though it were a part of a larger pattern of events including other headlines. In fact, those other headlines were carefully selected and expressed in such a way as to set the mood...which is remarkable.

A work acquaintance of mine has lately fallen prey to similar propaganda tactics...unfortunately deployed by her own mother. She's been filled with self-righteous outrage over the fact that a small number of Americans make more combined than the bottom half of wage earners. The failed logic being fed to her goes "money should be paid to each person according to how hard they work and how important their work is to society." She asks whether a professional athlete really works 10,000 times as hard as she does in a year. That's not how economics work (or even how they SHOULD work), but to her, that's enough logic on which to base an entire economic policy structure and she's getting all of this from her mother, who is doubtlessly getting all of it from progressive propagandists. Don't kid yourselves, those of you reading this little blog of ours. Although the ISN footage is an extreme example of media subversion, the selective culling of information to tell a story with the desired impact on public opinion is very much alive today on both sides of the political spectrum.

Writing: 8.5 / 9.0

Stephanie S.: As I noted above, I think ISN's propagandizing is a bit too obvious this time around. However, the script still does a nice job advancing the fourth-year story.

Acting: 8.5 / 8.0

Stephanie S.: I didn't really see the specific flaws my co-author notes below. I thought the performances were pretty strong (though not quite feature-worthy).

SABR Matt: I did feel like there were a few moments during the interview process where Boxleitner, Furlan, and Biggs hit certain specific lines WAY too hard to be believable in normal conversation so that the edited footage would look sinister. It would have been better if they'd come up with a good reason to have a big enough emotional response to be seen out of context as something sinister. As usual, the acting hurts this episode considerably, though there are good moments (such as Boxleitner's takes after the ISN broadcast).

Message: 10.0 / 10.0

Showing us, the viewers, how easy it can be to subvert the truth and influence us is among the greatest things JMS ever accomplished.

Highlights:

RANDALL: She threatened to grab me by the collar and throw me out an airlock if I didn't turn over a full manifest of our equipment!
IVANOVA: Any unauthorized shipments are a threat to station security. We had to.
SHERIDAN: Commander -- did you threaten to grab this man by the collar and throw him out an airlock?
IVANOVA: Yes, I did.
SHERIDAN: I'm shocked. Shocked and dismayed. I'd remind you that we're short on supplies here. We can't afford to take perfectly good clothing and throw it out into space. Always take the jacket off first. I told you that before. (to Randall) Sorry, she meant to say, 'Stripped naked and thrown out an airlock.' I apologize for any confusion this may have caused. (LOL! As I said, JMS does not like reporters.)

SHERIDAN: Mr. Randall -- everyone knows that ISN is a propaganda arm for President Clark. You didn't come here to do an objective story.
RANDALL: There's no such thing. The objective journalist is one of those great myths you read about, like a gryffin or a phoenix or an honest politician. Everyone's got an agenda whether they admit it or not. But you try not to let it get in the way of the truth. (Oddly enough, I agree with Randall -- to a point. Each journalist has a worldview, and that worldview does tend to influence what he or she writes. At the same time, we writers still have a duty to be honest. The fact that "everyone has an agenda" does not give us carte blanche to consciously twist the facts. /speechifying.)

Then, after this point, I think the episode really needs to be seen to be appreciated.

Classics: Farscape 2:5 - The Way We Weren't

Overall: 9.9

The Way We Weren't absolutely destroys me. Destroys me, I tell you! It is probably the series' finest stand-alone episode.

Plot Synopsis:

Farscape World has a recap here.

The Skinny:

If I recall correctly, John Adams once complained in his famous correspondence with Thomas Jefferson that every time he sat down to compose a letter to his comrade and rival, he wouldn't know where to begin because a multitude of topics always sprouted in his mind like trees in a forest. This is precisely how I feel about The Way We Weren't. The brilliance of Naren Shankar's script is so all-encompassing that I honestly don't know how to organize my reactions into a post that is even half-way coherent.

But let's start with Aeryn. Believe it or not, I don't think killing Moya's first Pilot was the worst thing Aeryn did on that assignment three cycles ago. From the moment of her birth, Aeryn had been brainwashed into believing that non-Sebacean lives don't matter -- that the Other was a contaminant and therefore something to be avoided. Perhaps more importantly, Aeryn was one guilty party among several; while she willingly pulled the trigger, Aeryn would not have been placed in that position if it weren't for Crais's orders (and - as we'll discuss in a moment - our Pilot's impatience). No -- betraying Velorek was the worst thing Aeryn did. You see, Aeryn truly loved her fellow Peacekeeper. What's more, she was wholly aware that using that connection to nab her favored assignment was wrong. But despite her own ambivalence, she gave Velorek up to Crais' tender mercies anyway. In a way, I can understand her decision. All her life, Peacekeeper Command had convinced Aeryn that sex was merely a means for the troops to let off steam -- that forming any kind of long-term intimate bond was impossible. That kind of perverse, upside-down attitude regarding intercourse is bound to deform a woman's conscience. Still, there is something fundamentally shocking in Aeryn's willingness (at the time) to ignore her own feelings for the sake of her ambition.

And speaking of ambition, let's now discuss Pilot. As Chiana correctly points out, it's not a surprise that Aeryn has committed heinous crimes; she was indeed a Peacekeeper, and no Peacekeeper is likely to serve without accumulating his or her share of spiritual black marks. It is a surprise, however, to discover that our Pilot had a role to play in the murder of Moya's first. That is the episode's coup de grace. If Shankar had focused solely on Aeryn's guilt, this would've been merely a "pretty good" episode -- but he doesn't stop there because he evidently realizes that sin can ensnare even the gentlest among us. That's how sin works, unfortunately; it takes our healthy desires and decent sentiments and perverts them -- twists them into something unrecognizable.

Above, I implied that I have little trouble putting myself in Aeryn's shoes and comprehending her motivations. Well, I comprehend Pilot's motivations all the more because I have felt that same yearning to learn -- to see the myriad wonders of the universe. I myself have looked up at the stars in the firmament and dreamed about visiting the worlds which circle some of those stars. Haven't we all? Isn't that why we watch and read science fiction? We in the audience can distance ourselves from Aeryn and her Peacekeeper mindset, but there's no way we can distance ourselves from Pilot because he is us. It's not as easy to deny that we would do anything - and I mean anything - to satisfy our burning wish to explore.

A little more than a month ago, when I reviewed Bone to Be Wild, I made the following observation:

...Farscape may be the most adult of the series currently on our docket. That assessment has less to do with the violence or the sexual content (although the show has both) and more to do with the nature of the universe presented. The world of Farscape, to put it simply, is a fallen world. Cruelty abounds -- and the choices that are presented to Crichton are less often choices between good and bad and more often choices between bad and worse. Normally speaking, a series this mired in the grey areas would turn me off, but Farscape (unlike, say, the reimagined BSG) injects just enough of the redemptive into its procedings to avoid this danger.

In very few episodes is this more true than in our current episode. The Way We Weren't is an unquestioned masterpiece of gritty realism in which the focus characters are forced to face the wages of their sins. But I believe it's also a very hopeful story. Aeryn and Pilot are already better people than they were three cycles ago -- and after the appointed time, Pilot will finally know what it's like to be naturally bonded to Moya. The process of atonement will be long and hard indeed, but it seems these flawed characters will eventually find their redemption.

And by the way, this episode blasts any doubts about the show's use of live-action actors and muppets to absolute smithereens. Yes, Pilot is a technical marvel, but you forget that completely here as the writing, Tupu's voice work, and the technology come together to bring us a flesh-and-blood being for whom we feel genuine sorrow. I guarantee that you will not walk away from that last scene between Pilot and Aeryn with dry eyes.

Writing: 10.0 WITH A NUCLEAR WARHEAD!
(Because a bullet is just not strong enough.)

Have I mentioned that this is one of the greatest Farscape scripts of all time?

Acting: 9.7

The performances here are gut-wrenching and virtually flawless. Bravo!

Message: 10.0

Shankar subtly yet inexorably convicts us all by highlighting our universal vulnerability to temptation. 'Tis a humbling and necessary message. See above.

Highlights:

Aeryn: (upset, angry, near tears) Yes, it's me. I admit it. Are you happy now?
Zhaan: This shows you have been aboard Moya before.
D'Argo: Why didn't you ever tell us?
Rygel: Criminally obvious, isn't it? She helped murder a defenseless Pilot!
Aeryn: It must have been about three cycles ago. I've been aboard hundreds of Leviathans, and I had no idea that it was Moya!
Chiana: Oh, so all non-Sebaceans look alike. Is that it?
Aeryn: I didn't know, Chiana!
John: Look - the Aeryn on that tape is not the Aeryn we know. That was a long time ago.
Rygel: Three cycles isn't that long! Heh! I was aboard Moya by then.
Zhaan: As was I.
Rygel: Maybe you were one of the ones who took a turn at torturing me. Ever torture a Hynerian?
D'Argo: Perhaps you helped torture me too.
Aeryn: NO!
John: Aeryn - just don't - (He puts a hand on Aeryn's shoulder, but Aeryn slaps it away.) Okay everybody. Neutral corners. Let's chill out for a microt. We all have things in our past that we'd rather not have on instant replay.
Zhaan: True enough, John. But I still can't accept the cold-blooded slaughter of such a helpless creature. (You're one to talk. Didn't you murder your lover?)
Aeryn: Oh! It's perfectly fine to cut off one of his arms then, is it, Zhaan? (Good jab, that.)
Rygel: Peacekeeper murderer! (Aeryn lunges furiously at him, but John goes after her and pulls her back.)
John: AERYN! NO! Don't! You're not helping your case.
Chiana: What have you guys been thinking all this time? What? She was out picking baskets of rolliss buds while all the other mean Peacekeepers did all the really nasty stuff? She was a Peacekeeper.
Aeryn: (flat) Yes. I was a Peacekeeper. And things were very different then.

(In the past.)
Velorek: You don't - enjoy being here with me?
Aeryn: Hm. I enjoy it.
Velorek: But it just isn't right to actually feel something for a fellow Peacekeeper, is it?
Aeryn: Well, what's the point? We won't be assigned to be together forever.
Velorek: We could be. I'm fairly high in the Military Tech Hierarchy. I could make it happen -- if you wanted me to.
Aeryn: Peacekeeper High Command makes all assignment decisions.
Velorek: High Command doesn't always make the right decisions. Come on, Aeryn. You and I have been intimate since the second solar day of our voyage to get here. There's something about you - something special - and I think you know it.
Aeryn: No. No. I'm not special.
Velorek: Don't take the Peacekeeper hard line, Aeryn. You understand what I'm saying. Can you honestly tell me - all you want is to fly Prowlers, like a thousand others? And serve a madman like Captain Crais?
Aeryn: That is outright insubordination!
Velorek: No, it's not. It's observation. Think beyond the box the Peacekeepers put your mind in, Aeryn. Crais is a maniac, and his coveted "project" - is an abomination.
Aeryn: No. I don't know anything about Crais’s project, and I don't want to know.
Velorek: The project will likely kill this Leviathan. And I cannot let that happen. Will not.
Aeryn: What does that mean?
Velorek: Aeryn, I know how I feel about you. And I think I know how you feel about me. When I leave here - I want you to come with me. You can be so much more.

John: Why don't you talk to me? Come on, Aeryn. Let me know. What's got you so torn up about what happened? Aeryn - what happened with Velorek? It's just you and me and the walls in here.
(Flashback to three cycles ago.)
Velorek: I have finished my assignment here. I'm going to be reassigned soon.
Aeryn: I want to go with you.
Velorek: You mean that? What about flying Prowlers?
Aeryn: I've been through all the accepted channels of command. Without something to single me out, they'll never listen to me.
Velorek: I can make this as exciting for you as flying any Prowler could ever be. I promise.
Aeryn: Where would we go?
Velorek: What does it matter? Somewhere else.
Aeryn: I don't know how to live somewhere else.
Velorek: You only say that because this is all you've ever known. In the right new place - you'll thrive.
Aeryn: (suddenly) Change you mind.
Velorek: What?
Aeryn: W-whatever you did with Crais’s plan - put it back!
Velorek: What are you talking about, Aeryn? Aeryn, what is this about? (At that moment, Crais enters with a contingent of soldiers.) What have you done? What is the meaning of this! (The soldiers seize him and proceed to drag him away.)
Crais: What do you think it is, Velorek? You're under arrest.
Velorek: On what charge?
Crais: Treason, of course. We can find no evidence of your attempts to sabotage my project. I think we may have caught you before you were able to do your damage. We'll find out soon enough. (to Aeryn) I assume you are the informant?
Aeryn: Yes, Captain. Officer Aeryn Sun.
Crais: Just contact Lieutenant Teeg. She will see that you are rewarded with the assignment you requested.
Aeryn: Prowler detail, sir.
Crais: Whatever. (to the soldiers) Bring him.
Velorek: (to Aeryn as he's being hauled away) You found that something special to single yourself out with. Congratulations Aeryn. No ordinary Peacekeeper would have attempted this. I told you you were special. (Well, that just cuts to the quick, doesn't it?)

John: Pilot -- we're just here to help. If you stay disconnected from Moya, you'll starve to death.
Pilot: (with weary bitterness) And with no one to regulate them, your precious life support systems won't function properly.
John: Right. Fine. Yes. We all want you back in the seat. And Moya must be pretty worried wondering where the hell you got to.
Pilot: Doesn't matter. She'll be better off without me. (Aeryn and John are quiet for a long moment as they ponder the depth of the great creature's misery.)
Aeryn: (tossing her pistol down in front of Pilot) That recording brought back memories of a time none of us wanted to remember. Based on my actions back then, I deserve to die. And if you wish to kill me right now - I'm not going to stop you. But please, spare the others - and yourself.
Pilot: Aeryn Sun -- It is not you who deserves death. It is I.
John: Okay, so you're not Moya's original Pilot. You replaced her - you can't blame yourself for that.
Pilot: I didn't only replace the old Pilot.
(Flashback.)
Pilot: (childlike as he looks up at Velorek) The Elders have already judged me. They said I was not yet worthy to pilot a Leviathan.
Velorek: If you believed that, you wouldn't be here right now. So, why are you here?
Pilot: (hanging his head) I want to be joined so badly...
Velorek: I can make that happen, young one.
Pilot: But the Elders - the Elders have not yet decreed it to be my destiny.
Velorek: I offer you the chance to make your destiny. Look up. What do you see?
Pilot: (he breathes the word with wonder and reverence) Stars!
Velorek: That is what I offer you. Stars.
Pilot: (wistful) I dream of nothing else.
Velorek: I offer you a Leviathan. All you have to do is agree to help me.
Pilot: (innocent, struggling to understand the implications of Velorek's offer) But you said - that - for me to be joined, the Old One would have to die.
Velorek: (firmly) That Pilot will die no matter what you do. (Pilot looks down and lets out a long, sad sigh as Velorek watches him like a hawk.) If you don't come with me, I'll find someone else who will. Someone who isn't afraid to take their place amongst the stars.
(Back to the present.)
Pilot: The fate of Moya's true Pilot was sealed at that moment. So you see, Aeryn, it wasn't really you who caused her death. It was me. If I hadn't agreed to come, Velorek may never have found a replacement Pilot. But -- (Tears well in his eyes.) -- but I just wanted so desperately to see the stars.
Aeryn: (who is also teary-eyed) Do you remember when you first came aboard Moya? Velorek stroked your cheek like this to calm you. (She reaches out and touches his face. Her voice cracks as she continues.) Back then, I couldn't fathom why he would do a thing like that -- and now, I couldn't fathom not doing it. We've come a long way since then, Pilot. And we've still got a long way to go. Take the journey with me. (Just in case you were wondering, this is me whenever I watch this scene:



I cry hard enough for my glasses to get smudgy. That is how good it is.)

It's Official: V Has Been Cancelled

V, No Ordinary Family Cancelled by ABC
We're not going to find out what happens next for Erica Evans and her new allies.

I must admit that this announcement fills me with relief more than anything else. While I was rather forgiving with my ratings, the task of reviewing this series was pretty torturous. V was neither "Lord King Badfic" translated to the small screen nor a storytelling triumph; it was just -- stunningly mediocre. Good ideas were scattered throughout, but the writers never pursued those ideas with any vigor.

At some point in the future - probably after they release the entire series on DVD - I'm going to compose a lengthy episode-by-episode post-mortem for V. I think I need to take this bad boy apart and explain in detail why it just didn't work.

Pardon the Interruption: House 7:21 - The Fix

Overall Rating: 8.5

For the first time since "Bombshells," I am hopeful that the two years House spent hitting rock bottom with his Vicodin addiction, recovering from said addiction, fighting for some happiness and dating Cuddy will not have been a cruel diversion with no intended purpose. They may not be going the way I'd hoped, but at least it appears that House will not return to status quo ante.

Bonus Commentary: TNG Ratings Guide from RightFans

We here at RightFans are covering a number of other canons first - including our favorite Trek franchise (Deep Space Nine). But while we wait for slots to open up for new canons (Stargate Atlantis, Star Trek: The Next Generation and Dr. Who (2005) would be next in line)...a cover only a few Next Gen episodes as time permits...I thought I would leave the readers with a blueprint for what's come once we get to the individual episodes on TNG, as I do believe that Next Gen is currently underrepresented here.

What follows will be a complete listing of TNG episodes, in chronological order, with letter grades and one-line comments to get the ball rolling. These may get changed slightly as we get to reviewing the individual episodes, but this mini-guide will let you know where we stand.

SEASON 1 (The year of pain)

1. Encounter at Farpoint (C) - I fail to understand how such a mundane puzzle is a good test of humanity when our own history is supposedly a story of enormous progress and the victory of man's better nature over barbarism.
   
2. The Naked Now (F) - This show does more to set back feminism (and logic) than anything I've seen on TV in the last 25 years.
3. Code of Honor (F) - Roddenbury's racism and defensive feminism (covering for sexism) are on full display here.
4. The Last Outpost (C-) - The Ferengi were almost interesting for a second there...almost.
5. Where No One Has Gone Before (C-) - Finally had the right idea (if this is a show about exploration...let's explore more imaginatively)...but the execution was a bit silly and cliche.
6. Lonely Among Us (D) - Boring episode with a side plot that has no actual relevance.
7. Justice (F) - Ridiculous idealism meets naive utopian vision...the silliness is interrupted by an ending that actually makes sense somehow, but it's not enough to save this episode.
8. The Battle (D+) - This is why the Ferengi failed as a scary adversary...the stories they wrote insisted on making the Ferengi idiotic, or personally destructive, rather than behaving in a way that would make evolutionary sense.
9. Hide and Q (C) - Interesting idea, but Riker is not really a good adversary for Q and the message isn't particularly well delivered.
10. Haven (D) - Arranged marriages? Still? And this race is allowed to be in the high and mighty Federation? And somehow a human family got involved?
11. The Big Goodbye (D) - If this is how the Enterprise crew remembers our culture...no wonder they think we're complete savages.
12. Datalore (B-) - Perhaps a bit corny, but at least the sense of danger was there and the character contrast was interesting.
13. Angel One (F) - WTFDiplomaticSex??
14. 11001001 (C+) - Halfway decent episode with an interesting related side plot and some REALLY bad pick-up lines.
    
15. Too Short a Season (B-) - The political intrigue was actually well written for once.
16. When the Bough Breaks (F) - UGH...that environmental 2X4 hurts.
17. Home soil (D) - Ugly script of mostly filler...with a side of sanctimonious human-hating thrown in.
18. Coming of Age (C) - The introduction of a possible conspiracy in Star Fleet is indeed intriguing.
19. Heart of Glory (C-) - Too much over the top bad Klingon acting and writing.
20. The Arsenal of Freedom (F) - Given the age (mutually assured destruction) the sentiment is understandable, but way off base.
21. Symbiosis (F) - Worst. Prime Directive Use. EVER.
22. Skin of Evil (B) - Sometimes evil is blind to reason, and sometimes good people die by it...and this marks the beginning of Data true journey to his inner humanity.
23. We'll Always Have Paris (D) - Really really boring episode...and there's no chemistry at all.
24. Conspiracy (B+) - We gave this one high marks despite some really poor use of special effects that they could have done without...first truly different and interesting episode they ever did.
25. The Neutral Zone (F) - I really...really hate temporal elitism.

SEASON 2 (The year of boredom)

1. The Child (D) - Well acted, not horribly written...but...this is basically rape, and no one seems to be outraged. Also...Pulaski is a complete prick and was never likable from moment one.
   
2. Where Silence Has No Lease (D) - Sometimes unique is not good - this is one of those times.
3. Elementary, Dear Data (C+) - One of the better Holodeck episodes...that's not saying much, but there you have it.
4. The Outrageous Okona (F) - This guy is neither outrageous, nor admirable and the fact that the writers think he's both...and fill him with jokes that we're supposed to pretend are funny...is rather alarming.
5. Loud as a Whisper (B) - A rare moment when the show's starry-eyed focus on diplomacy actually works.
6. The Schizoid Man (D) - Rather boring plot...and not a fan of the hammy writing.
7. Unnatural Selection (D+) - Pulaski never impressed me, but this episode was just mostly boring.
8. Matter of Honor (B-) - This one is actually quite interesting and fairly balanced the need to respect cultural identities with the need to know right from wrong.
9. The Measure of a Man (A) - A beautifully written rejection of selective freedom.
10. The Dauphin (D) - Bad acting, bad romantic dialogue, boring plot concept.
11. Contagion (B-) - Pretty solid all-around episode with an interesting fundamental concept and some linkages to franchise canon from the days of the Original Series.
12. The Royale (F) - When you take a really inane story...and then do a really inane, illogical parody of that story...and then completely fail to explain why you're doing this...you get a really inane episode.
    
13. Time Squared (C+) - At least this episode has an interesting dramatic tension to it...
14. The Icarus Factor (C) - The story is a bit slow, and the ambo-jitsu match was over-the-top cliche, but the basic story wasn't horrid.
15. Pen Pals (B) - A "Prime Directive" story done RIGHT...without all of the chest-thumping and speechifying. The debate over policy is rationally delivered, even though I disagree with Picard's position (especially given that we had the capacity to erase this girl's memory).
16. Q Who (A-) - The Borg (as looming adversary) were truly unique, truly terrifying, and immediately culturally relevant in ways that most people (conservative or liberal) can agree with.
17. Samaritan Snare (D-) - How is the Enterprise dumber than a race of kids who have to ride the short bus?
18. Up the Long Ladder (D) - It's not that the dilemma set forth in this episode is uninteresting...it's that the resolution to this dilemma is unfeasible in the face of real human nature.
19. Manhunt (C+) - I am not the Lwaxana Troi hater that some might be...and this one is at least somewhat humorous.
20. The Emissary (C) - The personal story for Worf is actually done pretty well...the "action" plot...is not.
21. Peak Performance (C+) - The B plot is much more interesting than the A plot - Data plots usually are. :)
22. Shades of Grey (F) - Worst. TNG. Ever.

SEASON 3 (the year of rebirth)

1. Evolution (C-) - Wesley almost gets everyone killed (again!) and yet is painted as the show's hero...but the plot is sufficiently interesting to prevent coma.
2. The Ensigns of Command (B) - Data kicks some booty and Picard gets to really piss off a race of evil bastards...what else could you want?
3. The Survivors (C) - Not a bad episode, but the conclusion is not sufficient payoff for an otherwise very slow plot.
4. Who Watches the Watchers (F) - I am more than a bit annoyed with any episode that paints religion as completely illogical and polygamy as the height of reason.
5. The Bonding (B) - This episode is actually very sweet in its own way - and shows the softer side of Worf.
6. Booby Trap (D) - They should just call this episode "Desperate for Boobies," because that's what Geordi is. Yeesh.
7. The Enemy (B-) - See, now this is a much better way to use Geordi - and I like that the writers write Worf's admittedly racist reaction to the Romulan in sickbay with some compassion, rather than with outright scorn.
8. The Price (F) - Trek writers should just give up and stop trying to write romance. Because this is more like a creepy friggin' stalker and a seriously damaged woman somehow ending up together than an appealing romance.
9. The Vengeance Factor (D) - Terribly boring episode involving a race of people we've never met before nor ever will again doing things Star Fleet shouldn't care about.
10. The Defector (A-) - A legitimately GREAT twist turns an above par episode into a feature-worthy study of morality in an amoral world.
11. The Hunted (B) - This is actually another good use of the Prime Directive...and an interesting problem to boot, given the moral ambiguities of solving one problem (costly war) by creating another at the expense of innocent people (super-soldiers you can't turn off).
    
12. The High Ground (B-) - Not a spectacular effort, but a solid rebuking of terrorism without being too simplistic.
13. Deja Q (B) - Amusing episode with a serious message to send about the importance of morality to direct a man's existence, no matter how powerful he might be.
14. A Matter of Perspective (C+) - Solid episode with creative presentation that keeps you guessing the entire time and delivers a satisfying conclusion.
15. Yesterday's Enterprise (B+) - Tasha Yar's role in this episode is particularly poignant (and a clever way to get the audience to care about the fate of the damned Enterprise C).
16. The Offspring (A) - *Very* sweet episode showcasing Data's strength of character and parenting skill, and revealing all of the wonderful things we've come to admire about the Enterprise crew.
17. Sins of the Father (A-) - Politically and personally intriguing story about the danger of allowing evil and corruption to flourish (and the personal costs paid by free men of good conscience) to preserve peace.
18. Allegiance (C) - Decently-made high concept sci-fi...nothing special to write home about.
19. Captain's Holiday (F) - Really terrible episode that was supposed to be an action adventure piece and turned out to be incredibly boring and farcical.
20. Tin Man (B-) - Another good vehicle for Data as two people discover what they truly desire in life.
21. Hollow Pursuits (B-) - A story revolving around a "who's he" that works because the who's he is sympathetic and because the story is more about the crew adapting to a man in need than about the man.
22. The Most Toys (B-) - Data is awesome. That is all.
23. Sarek (A) - This episode is completely carried by a brilliantly-written script that possesses one of the last great expressions of Vulcan ideology the franchise will ever see.
24. Menage a Troi (F) - EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW
25. Transfigurations (C) - Pretty typical fluffy, high concept episode - although at least Crusher doesn't run headlong into ill-advised doctor-patient romance just because she finds her John Doe interesting.
26. (and 4-1) The Best of Both Worlds (A+) - Everything was done perfectly (more or less) in this masterpiece - from Riker's characterization to the ambiance of fear and suspense that permeated the score.

SEASON 4 (the year of intrigue)

1. TBoBW (see above)
2. Family (A-) - There were actually consequences (!) and character developments (!!) for our heroes from past personal disasters - the sum total of the episode is very touching and very well written.
3. Brothers (B) - Lore and Data meet again...and this time Lore steals something meant for Data and kills his father - how Freudian!
4. Suddenly Human (C+) - Forcing Picard to realize that, yes, he CAN handle children, does give this episode a certain charm, but it falls short of its potential by concluding with unnecessary speechifying when a "my bad" would suffice.
5. Remember Me (D+) - Gates McFadden's acting really kills this episode...the over-acted, unrealistic reactions to her dire situation rob this episode of its tension.
6. Legacy (C+) - Data as the man who gets his heart ripped out by the career criminal manipulator turns another "who cares, some bad stuff happens to people we don't know" episode into a quality effort.
7. Reunion (A-) - Very strong showing for Worf...and a powerful message about the need for both tolerance AND assimilation in a free (and culturally mixed) society.
8. Future Imperfect (C) - This plot often feels very fragmented...and although this might be explained by the nature of the simulation in which Riker finds himself, I can't help but wonder what the take home point of all of this was?
9. Final Mission (B+) - Probably the best episode featuring Wesley...perhaps because Wesley isn't acting like a moron and nearly getting everyone killed or incompetently fumbling around with women or otherwise making himself look like a spaz.
10. The Loss (C+) - It's actually kind of cool to see how helpless Deanna feels without her gifts and watch her struggle to overcome this "handicap."
11. Data's Day (A-) - A story told from Data's perspective cannot possibly be this filled with emotional range and depth, can it? Yes...yes it can.
12. The Wounded (C) - This was a very well-made episode with a number of wonderful themes on display...that tramples its chances at feature status by proclaiming that peace can be bought with appeasement. How disappointing.
13. Devil's Due (B) - This one shouldn't have worked...it was way too corny to play out as well as it did...and yet...
    
14. Clues (A-) - For a high-concept piece, this one works because we all love Data so much that it kills us to see him forced to throw himself under a bus to protect his shipmates.
15. First Contact (D) - Did they really have to have Riker f*** his way out of another tight spot? Really?
16. Galaxy's Child (C+) - Good save, guys, on the whole creepy Geordi-flirting-with-a-holo-chick thing. This episode gets minor bonus points for being an interesting space puzzle and for having the real Leah Brahms kick Geordi's butt across Engineering for that holo-stunt.
17. Night Terrors (B+) - This one is sufficiently creepy and weird to keep you on your toes.
18. Identity Crisis (C) - Definitely a weird episode, but not horrid by any means...you do actually feel the pressure as Geordi races against the clock to stop his own transformation.
19. The Nth Degree (C-) - Weird filler that doesn't quite hit the mark on the interest-o-meter.
20. Qpid (F) - AWFUL Q episode that demonstrates a terrible lack of knowledge and understanding about the nature of the Q...and about love...and about Picard...and about Robinhood! UGH!
21. Drumhead (A) - But they QUICKLY recover with a fabulous episode in defense of freedom and the sanctity of a balanced justice system.
22. Half a Life (D) - More excellent work by Lwaxana Troi...and you really do feel her emotions with her...but the episode is ruined by an idiotic application of the Prime Directive and a further idiotic conclusion that not upsetting the apple cart is better than standing up for what's right.
23. The Host (D+) - The romance was BAD...but I appreciate that Crusher does the realistic thing and concludes that constant changes in host ruin her ability to form a bond.
24. The Mind's Eye (B-) - This one is pretty...um...scary...and the payoff of all of that stress on Geordi's behalf is solid.
25. In Theory (B+) - Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww...poor Data!!! The crushing defeat he seems to suffer when he loses his first real romantic entanglement makes the entire episode worth the viewing.
26. (and 5-1) Redemption (B) - A solidly entertaining political intrigue plot that results in the restoration fo Worf's family name (eventually) and the end of the threat posed by the Duras.

SEASON 5 (the year of excellence)

1. Redemption (see above)
2. Darmok (A+) - This was truly a unique (and outstanding) story with a perspective on language, communication and culture that is thought provoking and well expressed.
3. Ensign Ro (A-) - A surprisingly good episode which introduces a character intended to be at the heart of the next franchise (which is why she got so much screen time this season) who is almost as layered and interesting as Kira turned out to be.
4. Silicon Avatar (B) - Another above average Data-centered episode - this one featuring a surprising plot twist and a thought-provoking moral dilemma.
5. Disaster (B) - This is a very well-made, thoroughly entertaining episode...it doesn't quite match "Starship Down" (DS9 story with similar structure), but, it's a fun time nonetheless.
6. The Game (C) - Corny...and yet still somehow kind of enjoyable. It helps that the guest star is an absolute SMOKIN' hottie. (sorry Steph!)
7. Unification (B+) - Thick Romulan political intrigue, our final TNG look into the family of Spock (with similarly respectful and accurate depictions of those time-tested characters), and a well-crafted A/B -> A plot structure.
8. A Matter of Time (C+) - The debate over whether it's morally justified to reveal something about the future feels strange coming from Picard - a man who bellowed angrily at anyone who questioned him regarding the prime directive (temporal or otherwise) in years past - but strange in a good way.
9. New Ground (D+) - This one suffers from being a tad boring and from really dumb science that you notice because the story isn't that engaging.
10. Hero Worship (B+) - A near-feature Data character piece in which the writers break out the old Hollywood "stick a cute kid next to him and triple the love" trick and it works on softies like me. :)
11. Violations (C+) - Not an overly wow-inducing plot, but it certainly is an interesting twist on sexual abuse.
12. The Masterpiece Society (D) - I think the concept is a theoretical impossibility, the realization has its' heart in the right place but fails to make the most powerful arguments against eugenics, and Troi's involvement in the story is nauseating.
13. Conundrum (C+) - Bonus points to a routine episode for making the case that our morality lies outside of our experiential memories and can alert us when something is wrong with our perceptions.
14. Power Play (D) - Ehh...this one never really made much sense to me, to be honest.
15. Ethics (A-) - An outstanding piece in defense of the Hippocratic Oath, and an uplifting look into Worf's relationship with Troi and Alexander.
16. The Outcast (F) - Sorry...but this is not a very-well-veiled comment on gender roles, sexual preferences and stereotypes, and not a very accurate take on the opposition to standing Hollywood positions on those subjects.
17. Cause and Effect (C+) - Bonus points for the ominous mood they managed to maintain at each iteration of the loop and for blowing up the Enterprise four times in one hour!
18. The First Duty (A) - OK...so THIS is actually the strongest Wesley story - for once, our Marty Stu fanboy stand-in is NOT playing the hero...he's growing up and making some big mistakes along the way...and he needs a kick in the ass to do the right thing from the man he respects most.
19. Cost of Living (F) - Oh BAAAAARF! This kind of irresponsible, selfish, hedonistic philosophy has led to the ruination of hope and optimism in America. Shame on you, L'waxana.
20. The Perfect Mate (D-) - I'm sorry, but no amount of intriguing dialogue...even level-headed debate over breakfast, can correct an episode whose conclusion is that sexual slavery is OK as long as the slave doesn't ask out.
21. Imaginary Friend (B-) - The message here - that children need boundaries to keep them safe and teach them right from wrong - makes this one well worth watching...and runs counter to everything we just saw in "Cost of Living"...but whatever.
    
22. I Borg (A) - A stunning defense of individual liberty and, beyond that, a compellingly written story.
23. The Next Phase (B-) - Apart from the obvious scientific gaffe that Ro and Geordi are out of phase and can pass through walls but don't fall through the floor (sigh)...this episode is actually an interesting portrait in contrasts between Ro and LaForge.
24. The Inner Light (A+) - The artistic beauty of every word, every sound, every sight in this episode will blow you away - the enduring spirit of a bygone culture will explode your heart like the Grinch on Christmas morning.
25. (and 6-1) Time's Arrow (D) - They went for a big, ambitious action story but killed it with mediocre guest actors and a horribly heavy handed temporal bigotry.

SEASON 6 (the year of consistency)

1. Time's Arrow (see above)
2. Realm of Fear (C) - This episode makes the mistake of focusing on a bit player to the exclusion of the main cast and leaves you a little unfulfilled.
3. Man of the People (D) - Sadly, I can't say I find it the least bit interesting to discuss this episode.
4. Relics (B-) - Gimmicky and we all know it...but it works because the story is not a cheesy hero-worship trip...it's a commentary on on the timelessness of human achievement and perseverance.
5. Schisms (C+) - Not ground-breaking in originality, but sufficiently creepy to keep you entertained.
6. True Q (C-) -This incarnation of Q doesn't sit well with me when compared to earlier (and even a few later) versions that behaved in ways you could understand.
7. Rascals (B+) - Goofy humor, but in the right spirit, especially for Guinan and Ro...a good piece of fluff if I ever saw one.
8. A Fistful of Datas (D-) - Pretty darned boring, and the plot has been done before in slightly different forms.
9. The Quality of Life (A-) - While lacking the bombastic (and rich) dialogue and intrigue of "The Measure of a Man," this one is nonetheless a fascinating second exploration of the rights of artificial intelligence (and the definition of sentience)...and Data is the ideal defender given his own experiences.
10. Chain of Command (A) - References to 1984 are juuuust subtle enough not to be obnoxious and a look at the inner workings of the Obsidian Order benefited more than just this episode...or even this franchise.
11. Ship in a Bottle (D+) - I liked the first exploration of Moriarty (and other explorations of what we perceive to be reality) better than this one.
12. Aquiel (D) - You know...the first time I watched this one, I kind of liked it, but as I've matured, each subsequent viewing is more off-putting, perhaps because Geordi's defense of (and love for) Aquiel are never properly explained/set up.
13. Face of the Enemy (B+) - Later Trek writers abandoned Roddenbury's sexism and hackery and gave Troi some moments that made her out to be something greater than a useless moron.
14. Tapestry (A+) - A decisive rebel yell against the notion that our identity is bound by our DNA...the PERFECT use of Q - as a wiser (if irreverent) shepherd for the younger races - and a well-constructed look at Picard through the ages. It's a hit for a reason (and it's more than just John Delancie's acting chops).
15. Birthright (A-) - I used to like part one better than part two, because I was totally partial to Data (and I still enjoy that plot), but I actually think Worf's story carries the more important message - namely that if you need to remove someone's freedom to peacefully coexist, then you've accomplished nothing toward tolerance...or toward peace.
16. Starship Mine (B) - Although the plot is a bit predictable, it's nice to see Picard's military aptitude and survival skills on display and the banter between Picard and the criminals on his ship achieves a level of entertainment far exceeding expectations.
17. Lessons (A-) - A typical romance plot...done RIGHT! Yep...Picard gets it on with some new chick almost instantly, but the chemistry is actually outstanding between them because Darren may be one of the best-written female guest-roles the show has ever conjured and because they pulled the brilliance of 'The Inner Light' into the story...and better yet, the reality of their military lives (and the consequences for their romance) is written with a maturity completely absent from the vast majority of Trek romances.
18. The Chase (D) - I am going to echo the thoughts of the Cardassians and Klingons, upon seeing that all of this effort to uncover an ancient riddle buried in our very DNA (!!) is merely a greeting from a long-dead race we'll never meet and a call for mutual cooperation based solely on their common heritage. "THAT'S IT?!?!"
19. Frame of Mind (B) - My opinion of this episode has gradually lowered from "slam-dunk all-time great" to "entertaining episode long on atmosphere, but short on substance." It works because Frakes does a good job with his schizoid scene work and because the shattered atmosphere is felt from moment one...but it falls short of greatness because Riker goes through all of those freaky experiences and nothing is learned about him as a person, nor did consequences persist afterward.
20. Suspicions (B+) - Not quite a feature, but a very nice little mystery told in a unique way and a good subversion of the hammy, one-dimensional Ferengi archetype.
21. Rightful Heir (C) - The exploration of faith would have been more interesting if the forgery of Kahless hadn't been discovered...if different beliefs arose from the mix of evidence.
22. Second Chances (D+) - This one feels like a bit of an over-reach to me. Putting Troi and los dos Riker in that situation didn't work quite as well as the show's writers perhaps imagined because Riker mark II wasn't all that well written.
23. Timescape (C) - The music was too subdued to convey the freaky setting, IMHO. The tension is absent from what should have been a scary episode.
24. (and 7-1) Descent (C+) - Exploring the capacity for desire and hatred to be addictive to a race of emotionless drones (and Data) should have worked better than it did...I think the story would have been way more interesting if Data went dark-side WITHOUT Lore having to deactivate his ethical subroutine...among other things they could have done.

SEASON 7 (The year of fatigue)

1. Descent (see above)
2. Liaisons (C-) - Other than Worf's guest, the ambassadors were all horrifically bad actors, and I find the entire concept of any life form existing without the basic concept of love...and especially pleasure and anger (which are necessary survival emotions) to be quite impossible.
3. Interface (C-) - Again...this should have worked better than it did, but we had no back story...no reason to be prepared to feel something for Geordi before this Mom business started - he's never even mentioned his parents or the state of his family before this.
4. Gambit (B-) - A good action vehicle for Stewart and Frakes, but other than the interesting interplay between them when having to put on a show for the benefit of their criminal associates, a routine episode.
5. Phantasms (C+) - The plot concept makes little or no sense, but it's used effectively (it's creepy enough to keep you interested), and the exploration of Data's psyche is worth the viewing.
6. Dark Page (D) - Pretty darned boring.
7. Attached (A-) - Hey, what do you know...an episode where two people are forced to admit they might have romantic feelings for one another...and they don't immediately screw like bunnies!
8. Force of Nature (F) - This episode concluded so idiotically that even the writers realized how stupid it was and ignored the "warp speed limit" thing entirely within half a year of penning it.
9. Inheritance (B) - Another good Data story...I admit...I am biased! But Julianna Taner is written so well, it's a shame we never see her again.
10. Parallels (B-) - Bonus points to a decent action show for inventing the possibility that we might have LOST in TBoBW!
11. The Pegasus (B-) - An interesting look at the balance between the virtues of loyalty and duty vs. the need for an absolute moral compass. The thing that keeps this from getting a better score for me is that the "bad guy" was right. The treaty banning us from using cloaking technology was in fact extremely stupid.
12. Homeward (C+) - It's nice to see someone force the Federation not to be retarded in its' application of the Prime Directive...nice to see the show define responsibility in terms of making a life-long commitment to someone...and yet I can't get too enthused with the show because the B plot seems to be placed on the moral high ground - one life unfortunately lost is made the equal of hundreds saved to prove a plot-demanded point that the Prime Directive is above reproach.
13. Sub Rosa (F) - WTF?? Crusher gets touched in just the right way by a spirit and she's ready to throw her whole life away?? Are we really arguing that all women want is orgasms on demand and if they have that, they don't care about who they are or what they're doing? Seriously...WTF????
14. Lower Decks (A-) - The juxtaposition of one story from two points of view (the one we know from on high...the senior officers...and the view from below...a group of characters, most of whom are well written and given interesting back story) is brilliant.
15. Thine Own Self (D) - I must say...I didn't find this one to be a very convincing (or interesting) story. A memory-less Data shouldn't have been so quick to adapt to his circumstances...no matter what he's capable of when not impaired.
16. Masks (F) - Nonsensical plot badly written, HORRIBLY acted by Spiner (odd...he's normally a pro), and dumbly directed.
17. Eye of the Beholder (D) - Hammy and the kind of cheap trick (the "gotcha" with a wink stuff that writers love to do too often on TV) that annoys me.
18. Genesis (F) - They told this story backwards. It should have begun with Picard and Data running through darkened corridors, trying to figure out what happened to the crew and how to fix it...and the flashbacks should have been mixed in throughout. They also needed better science...it was so laughably bad that even if the show was well-made, it would have been distracting.
19. Journey's End (D) - Not a fan of being beaten about the face and head with the guilt stick for no particular reason.
20. Firstborn (C) - The definition of an average episode...nothing stands out about this one, sorry to say.
21. Bloodlines (C-) - Let's bring back an "enemy" from plots that were not well liked to begin with...and give Picard a fake son to bond with...they were really reaching here.
22. Emergence (D) - This was high concept done too directly. An interesting idea, but all of the metaphors in the Holodeck were WAY too "on the nose."
23. Preemptive Strike (B) - The fall of Ensign Ro was about as believable as everything else in her character arc...this one feels rather tragic, especially when she says her goodbyes to Picard.
24. All Good Things (A) - A good send-off for the show and a nice bookend to Encounter at Farpoint showing the grudging respect Q has developed for our heroes as we've grown into a stronger race.